A surprisingly suspenseless Sunday

I experienced something strange on Sunday afternoon, and it wasn’t until Arizona’s fourth-quarter field-goal attempt thunked off an upright that I figured out what it was.

The Seahawks played a totally normal, perhaps even fundamentally sound football game.

While I’m certain that this has happened in the past, I’ll be damned if I can remember when.

I’m not complaining about this fact necessarily. I grew to embrace the fact that this team is kooky as hell and capable of anything.

In fact, I was kind of worried when Seattle fired Pete Carroll that he’d take the chaos with him, but then this season started and the Seahawks suffered TWO safeties in their first game under Mike Macdonald and I knew this football team was still capable of being utterly crazy.

Sure enough, they’re nuts. The kind of team that will fumble away two kickoffs and allow the opponent to run one back for a touchdown and still win.

But honestly, it can be kind of exhausting, which is what made Sunday’s 30-18 victory in Arizona feel like a freaking scalp massage.

The Seahawks scored on four of their first five possessions and while they flirted with letting the Cardinals make it a one-score game in the fourth quarter, Arizona ultimately turned down the offer to make it an interesting game.

We’ll get to the biggest takeaways from the game as well as outline the playoff implications, but first, let’s take a little listening tour.

After three-loss Alabama — which did not play for its conference title — was left out of the 12-team playoff field over two-loss SMU — which did play for its conference title — the Crimson Tide’s athletic director said that his school may need to revisit its out-of-conference scheduling.

This amuses me for a few reasons:

1. Out-of-conference scheduling had absolutely NOTHING to do with Alabama’s omission. The Crimson Tide won their four out-of-conference games, which were against a veritable murderer’s row of Western Kentucky, South Florida, Wisconsin and Mercer. That’s ONE opponent from the so-called Power 4 conferences.

2. Alabama lost to Vanderbilt, which had not beaten the Tide in 40 years. Then it lost to Oklahoma. Both the Commodores and the Sooners finished 6-6.

3. A year ago, the playoff selection committee was so intent on including Alabama in the four-team field that it omitted an undefeated Florida State team. While I understand the rationale that was used — Florida State’s quarterback having suffered an injury — it sure seems like Alabama is getting awfully entitled to believe it should always get invited ahead of teams that have fewer losses.

My only concern in this whole thing is that the playoff selection process seems to have attracted some of the Alabama ire that I would like to be trained exclusively on Kalen DeBoer.

The Seahawks offense does not start fast. In fact, it has now been 17 regular-season games since they scored a touchdown on their opening possession. That is the second-longest active streak in the NFL.

In the previous nine games, the Seahawks scored a combined total of 13 points in the first quarter.

They scored 17 in the opening period in Arizona thanks largely to a pair of interceptions thrown by Kyler Murray.

The Seahawks — on the other hand — did not turn the ball over.

Turnover margin is the single most telling statistic in an NFL game. More than yards. More than sacks. More than third-down conversions. Turnovers.

Seattle has committed 19 turnovers this season, which is tied for eighth-most of any team in the league. None of those seven teams that have committed 20 or more turnovers currently holds a winning record.

Now at the risk of pulling a hamstring, I’m going to stretch as far as I can to turn this into a potential positive. The Seahawks are 8-5 in spite of committing those 19 turnovers. If they can stop turning the ball over, they might be a very difficult team to beat as demonstrated by Sunday’s game.

So that’s what a run game looks like …

I had forgotten.

The Seahawks rushed for a season-high 176 yards in Arizona despite missing Kenneth Walker, who was out with a calf injury.

Zach Charbonnet gained 134 yards, the highest single-game total for any Seahawk since Kenneth Walker ran for 167 yards against the Chargers on Oct. 23, 2022. That was Walker’s rookie season.

I don’t want to get carried away here because it’s just one game buuuuuuuuut … it sure seems like Seattle has found something on the right side of the line with Abe Lucas back at right tackle and rookie Sataoa Laumea playing next to him. Seeing those two big dudes pull is intimidating if nothing else.

Two weeks ago, the Seahawks rushed 25 times for 65 yards against that Arizona team, which works out to an average of 2.6 yards.

On Sunday, Seattle rushed 35 times for 176 yards, an average of 5.7.

Playoff logistics

Simple version: Seattle’s clearest path to the playoffs is to win its division, which will require the Seahawks to (at least) match the Rams’ record over the final four weeks. It is possible — but pretty unlikely — for the Seahawks to make the playoffs without winning the division.

For you folks who want the more complicated version …

Seattle (8-5 overall, 3-2 division)

Remaining opponents: vs. Packers (9-4), vs. Vikings (11-2), at Bears (4-9), at Rams (7-6).

The Seahawks have a one-game lead in the division, but also have a more difficult remaining schedule than the other three teams in the division.

If Seattle wins its next four games, it’s guaranteed the division title. If it wins two of the next three games and then beats the Rams in the regular-season finale, it wins the division title. If it matches L.A.’s record over the final four games, it wins the division title.

Los Angeles Rams (7-6 overall, 2-1 division)

Remaining opponents: at 49ers (6-7), at Jets (3-10), vs. Cardinals (6-7), vs. Seahawks (8-5).

San Francisco (6-7 overall, 1-3 division)

Remaining opponents: vs. Rams (7-6), at Dolphins (6-7), vs. Lions (12-1), at Cardinals (6-7).

Arizona (6-7, 2-2 division)

Remaining opponents: vs. Patriots (3-10), at Panthers (3-10), at Rams (7-6), vs. 49ers (6-7).

Wild-card possibilities

It is possible for the Seahawks to make the playoffs without winning the division. It is, however, unlikely in my opinion. Here are the three teams currently in position for the wild-card berths in the NFC:

Minnesota (11-2, 6-2 conference)

Remaining schedule: vs. Bears (4-9), at Seahawks (8-5), vs. Packers (9-4), at Lions (12-1).

The Vikings would need to lose each of their final four games for Seattle even to have a chance of tying Minnesota in the wild-card race.

Green Bay (9-4, 4-4 conference)

Remaining schedule: at Seahawks (8-5), vs. Saints (5-8), at Vikings (11-2), vs. Bears (4-9).

The Seahawks would need to beat Green Bay on Sunday and have the Packers lose at least one of their final three games for the Seahawks to have a chance at holding a head-to-head tiebreaker against the Packers should the two teams finish tied for a wild-card berth.

Washington (8-5, 5-3 conference)

Remaining schedule: at Saints (5-8), vs. Eagles (11-2), vs. Falcons (6-7), at Cowboys (5-7).

Washington is assured of having a better conference record than Seattle should the two teams finish tied in overall record.