Tough edit: USA Today's Dan Wolken

Welcome to the tough edit where I get all forensic on a piece of sports writing to point out all of the things that make me grit my teeth. First up: Dan Wolken of the USA Today, whose Tuesday column was titled, “Blazers star Damian Lillard is earning a new moniker: NBA’s most annoying player.”

The column was sufficiently obtuse as to earn Dan Wolken our second nomination for the Headinass Award, which will be given out here at The Dang Apostrophe at the end of the year. He joins Ric Bucher, who stated that Kevin Durant needed to get married earlier this year.

The original text of Wolken’s story is below in bold. My comments are in italics with a vertical red bar to the left:

Given his age and the current state of his team, Damian Lillard is not going to win a championship with the Portland Trail Blazers. But with every turn in the will-he-or-won’t-he saga that plays out in interview clips and coded messages on social media, Lillard moves one step closer to locking up a different title: The NBA’s most annoying player.

Dame Time was must-watch television when it meant swishing 40-foot shots in the playoffs. Lately, it’s got a different connotation. It’s time for Lillard to say what he means and mean what he says about his future with the only franchise he’s ever played for.

Enough already.

Lillard, who turns 33 in a couple weeks, is at a career crossroads. His first 11 seasons in the league have produced some excellent basketball and a couple good playoff runs but no real chances to win a title. And with Portland drafting Scoot Henderson at No. 3 overall, unable to find a suitable trade that would net another ready-made star, the reality is that it’s time to pivot toward a plan that might — might — make the Trail Blazers contenders by the time Lillard’s prime is long in the past.

Lillard, commendably in many ways, has been firm over the years that he wants to stay in Portland and be forever associated with that city and team. That has put him in stark contrast with a litany of stars in the last decade who have demanded their exit from circumstances they didn’t like regardless of contract status.

But gauging by the comments Lillard has made in various interviews lately or the messages he’s laundered through unofficial spokespeople in the media, it is clear that he’s wavering.

And the way it’s playing out publicly is unbecoming of a player with a reputation for being a grownup and consummate professional. 

In the days and weeks leading up to the draft, the Lillard speculation was somewhat tolerable. The Blazers were in a unique position with the No. 3 pick, an asset that seemed to pretty clearly give them a choice of two paths. 

Trade the pick and perhaps some other young assets that would allow Lillard to make a couple more runs as he moves into his mid- and late-30s or draft Henderson and go all-in on the youth movement — which would obviously include getting significant assets in a Lillard trade.

Simple, right? Apparently not. And as a result, the rest of us are rolling our eyes so much that it might soon become a new medical condition.

What happened between Lillard and the Trail Blazers in the days and weeks leading up to the draft can best be described as some of the lamest, most passive-aggressive behavior we’ve seen in these inevitable divorce situations — and that's saying something given the high bar LeBron James has set for his peers in that department.

First of all, the fact you’re citing “inevitable divorce situations” gives a pretty good idea of what you think will happen. Second, what specifically happened in the days and weeks leading up to the draft? I’m being serious. I pay fairly close attention to the NBA, and I wouldn’t consider it at all out of the ordinary by NBA standards. Was it lamer than Dwight Howard’s exit from Orlando? Ben Simmons’s departure from Philadelphia? James Harden from the Nets? From the Rockets? If you think Lillard’s actions are “some of the lamest, most passive-aggressive behavior we’ve seen” I’m not sure how much you know about the NBA, Dan.

What I think you’re actually sick of is the opinions that you’ve seen on ESPN’s talking shows like "First Take” and “Get Up!” or FS1’s lineup. And honestly, I get that. But if you’re mad about the hot-take competition regarding Lillard’s future, perhaps you should address the hot-take factory where those opinions are being manufactured and distributed. Instead, you’ve decided to write about Lillard as if he’s throwing a temper tantrum when he’s not.

Lillard believes he can win in Portland but doesn’t want to play with kids. He might or might not like the idea of playing in Miami. The team either did or did not communicate its plans with Lillard as the draft was approaching. And, in perhaps the most laughable bit of news that has come out, Yahoo! Sports reported that the Blazers weren’t trying to trade Lillard to Miami but rather were hoping to put forth a “compelling package” that would net Bam Adebayo off a team that just played in the NBA Finals.

Uh huh.

But the latest, most nauseating development surely came on Monday when Chris Haynes of TNT and Bleacher Report — a reporter who is well known to have a close relationship with Lillard — said that Lillard and agent Aaron Goodwin were meeting with Blazers executives to discuss the direction of the franchise.

Hours later, general manager Joe Cronin issued a statement that included these words: “We remain committed to building a winner around Dame.”

The capper, though, came again via Haynes in a video posted on Bleacher Report’s Web site: “He doesn’t want to be on a team that’s just stacked. He doesn't want to have a team where it's just three All-Stars or three superstars and they go and battle that way. He just wants a team that has a shot.”

Will someone in Portland please be the adult here?

Lillard has been one of the NBA’s best players for more than a decade, but whether he wins a championship or plays on another really good team just isn’t that important in the grand scheme of things.

He’s not some kind of martyr if he stays in a small market his entire career and settles for one conference finals appearance in 2019 as the apex of his run. Likewise, if Lillard goes to Miami or somewhere else and eventually wins a ring while surrounded by other great players, what really changes for him other than being able to say he played for a championship team?

All the stuff about needing a title to be viewed a certain way in history? That’s all fake unless we are splitting the finest of hairs about the greatest of the greatest, and Lillard isn’t part of those conversations anyway. He’s a Hall of Fame guy if he never picks up a basketball again, and at this stage of the game the needle isn’t going to move very much for him in either direction. 

So the question is what does he want to do, and what’s realistic?

If Lillard’s goal is to truly compete for a title, he needs to come to terms with the reality that time and circumstance is not on his side in Portland and ask the team to find him a better situation.

If his goal is to leave a legacy as Portland’s forever king, then he needs to be all-in on the idea that the Blazers might be ready to compete in important playoff games again when he’s on the other side of 35.

Either way, it’s up to him. But he needs to step up to the plate, stop the double-talk and make his intentions known. Lillard has spent most of his career as one of the NBA’s most admirable players, but this interminable limbo has been a decidedly ugly look.

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